Just The Tips

I like giving advice.  I especially like giving advice when I don't have to see anyone rolling their eyes, doing the exact opposite of what I've suggested, or worse, ignoring me.  You've probably noticed, though, that my blog posts tend to be heavier on the fluff and lighter on the advice.  That is, until this one!  Here we go with all advice, no fluff.  Okay, so it'll probably be, like 90/10 advice to fluff.  Maybe 80/20.  Just pay attention!

• ADD CRUNCH to your ice cream.  Cold, sweet, creamy treats are better with a bit of a bite.  Honey roasted peanuts are a favorite on almost every flavor other than mint, but you will also enjoy crushed graham crackers, cookies, chocolate-covered pretzels, M & M's (Or, as Cupcake calls them, "LMNs." She's been singing a lot of alphabet song, lately.), plain pretzels, dry roasted peanuts, and any kind of sweet baking morsel. 
• BE KIND always.  Do you seriously think you'll ever regret being kind to someone?  Even if they don't deserve, notice, or appreciate your kindness, you still did the right thing.  If not for your own sake, do it for Helen.  
• BE GRATEFUL and dwell on your gratitude.  I've given myself two Summer Projects to complete.  One is to toilet train Cupcake, the other is to make sure Rip Claw understands how grateful he should be for his blessings.  He gets rewarded with a star for writing at least 5 days a week in his Big Book of Thanks. I realized that in order to feel gratitude for what he does have, he has to be able to see and understand what it means to have not.  I've taken to telling him about something mildly horrible each day in order to drive home the message that he's got it good.  Sunday, I showed him a newspaper picture of a street in Iraq where dozens of men walked with rifles held high, having just volunteered to help stop the rebel terrorists from killing innocent people.  Thursday, I told him about how people used to have to go to stores to shop for things, and if they couldn't find what they wanted, they would have to use a phone book to call another store.  Then, if they ordered something through the mail, it might take a month to arrive.

School has been out for 2 weeks, and already he's writing letters backward and forming sentences like "in do'nt go tso stores" Love it.

• EAT A CALZONE made like I make them.  Recipe available upon request.  I'm not including it because it would bring my fluff percentage up to at least 30.
• READ because reading is awesome.  I recently finished The Invention of Wings by Sue Monk Kidd and loved it.  I'm now in the midst of a library copy of One Summer by Bill Bryson, and I'm seriously considering buying a copy for Charming to read at the same time so that I'll have someone to talk about it to.  I know the author wasn't in America, in 1927, experiencing all that was happening, but the book reads like you're being told a first-hand account of really cool historical events.  If you've read it, please let me know so that I can talk to you about it instead of blurting out things like, "Prohibition was the worst!" and "Wow.  Babe Ruth." at random times.
• THINK OUTSIDE THE RED when it comes to fries.  I feel that I may have failed newcomers here by not posting my fry dipping advice all the time.  
• EXERCISE.  I don't have to tell you that, though, right?  There's really no excuse not to.

I don't know who Bill Phillips is, but he's right.
I also don't know if I could eat a doughnut that large, but if it's blueberry cake, I might like to try.

• GIVE IN to your quirks.  I only recently stopped making excuses for mine, and I must say, it has been quite freeing.  I stack the papers neatly just before I put them in the shredder.  I color coordinate my to-do list based on how much I like or hate the task.  "Make phone calls" is in orange, because making phone calls is the worst, and orange is the worst color post-it I have.  It bothers me when the two sides of the dishwasher racks are unevenly weighted, like the left side is going to tease the right side for having to work harder.  Everybody has their quirks, and the sooner we all admit them, the sooner we can find others with whom to commiserate.
• SMILE at someone.  One thing I love about being a mostly-stay-at-home-mom is the absence of customers and co-workers telling me to smile.  I smile a lot, because I'm a happy person. When I'm not smiling, it's usually because I'm not a complete idiot walking around with a toothy grin spread across my face to hide the absence of intelligent thoughts. When someone tells me to smile, I immediately want to scowl and kick them in the teeth.  However, I'm telling you to do it because when you give someone a friendly smile, it's really hard for them not to smile back.  Here, I'll even give you some help!

So, how do you think I did?  Nowhere close to 90/10, eh?  

Care to share any of your quirks?

Calzones.  Just a friendly reminder that my recipe is available.

Fat Tuesdays are Back!

The longest 2 weeks of my life have finally passed.  Actually, I'm being dramatic.  The 14 days of clean eating and drinking did not drag by as slowly as I had expected.  Now that Charming and I can once again build up our chip supply without guilt, a few questions remain.

Results?  Have you seen that commercial where the husband and wife both try to lose weight and the husband sheds pounds like magic while the wife stays the same?  I think it's an ad for a diet pill.  Or for e-harmony.  Anyway, that's pretty much what happened.  I don't have a picture to illustrate this statement (and I do not recommend googling "fat wife skinny husband" images) so here's one that doesn't relate:

Cupcake loves this picture.  "Mama!  Daddy!  Aw!  Cute!  Daddy cute!"

On the first day of the challenge, I weighed myself.  We don't own a scale (I wonder if someone would accept my iron as a trade for one?) so I weigh in at the grocery store, which necessitates the wearing of clothes and shoes.  I've debated a while, and can't come up with a good reason not to share the actual number: 129.5.  I realize, of course, that my horror of horrors number is the same as another person's dreamy of dreaminess number, but please don't hold that against me.  When I delivered Cupcake, I weighed 136.  This number is the highest I've seen when I've stood on a scale as just one person; not weighing for two.  Charming, too, had put on some weight after we got married.  You've heard of the Freshman 15?  I think there's also a Newlywed 19.  However, after running consistently for a little over a year, he had lost many of those extra pounds, and was happy(ish) with his weight.  He kept forgetting to step on a scale until the end of the 2 week challenge, so his weight loss is from when he last weighed himself in early December.  11 pounds!  I lost 2.5.  I knew I wasn't going to shed a year's worth of late-night fried food snacks and 52 Tuesdays' worth of tacos in two weeks, but I must admit, past experiences had me hoping for a bigger jump start in the direction of my goal weight.  It's just another reminder that I'm not 22, and how unforgiving women's bodies are as we age.

Process?  Charming and I both held up pretty well throughout the challenge.  No candy, no chip snacks, no* alcohol, breakfast every day, and significantly smaller portions for our meals.  Neither of us experienced any ill effects from the deprivation of our usual sugar, fat, and alcohol intake.  We both tried some of the Shakeology stuff, and reached the conclusion that it will not be a regular addition to our diet.

Lessons Learned?  The most meaningful and surprising lesson I learned was that I actually do have willpower!  Ice cream in the freezer, a huge bag full of Halloween and Christmas candy, a couple of beers, and an open bag of chips, all were left untouched by me!  I know, I do things that are difficult for some people (like run double digit miles) and it might seem obvious that I have willpower because I get up early to run or go to the gym.  However, those are activities I enjoy.  Yeah, it's difficult sometimes to crawl out of the warm, cozy bed to run in the cold, dark, morning, but I do so because I want to, not because I feel like I need to.  This diet challenge was different.  I wanted to feel healthier, lose weight, and set a good example for Rip Claw and Cupcake; I didn't want to deny myself the pleasures of candy, beer, tacos and chips.  I was quite proud to discover that I can, indeed, make difficult changes that will be beneficial in the long term.

Guiltless homemade chicken tacos with quinoa on the side.

I also learned that:

• The absence of alcohol does not equal the absence of migraine headaches.  Boo.  
• Eating breakfast, 2 healthy snacks, lunch and dinner does satisfy my hunger.  
• I don't need a second helping to feel full; I need to eat more slowly and let my body do the work it is designed to do.  
• Based on the amount of time I spent each day thinking about pizza, I think research should be performed to determine whether it is an addictive substance.  
• It's easier to be bright eyed and bushy tailed at 5:30 a.m. if I haven't had that glass of wine the night before.  
• Preparing healthy meals and snacks in advance and in bulk makes it much easier to make healthy choices.  
• I don't necessarily need motivation and support from a coach or health professional.  Making the commitment is more important than following the exact plan, in my experience. 

Now what?  As you may have realized, this 2 week challenge did not produce life-, body-, or fit-of-clothes- changing results for me, but I didn't really expect that it would.  I did happen to read some articles about dieting during the challenge, and was able to confirm what I already knew: a long-term commitment to eating a healthy diet and staying active is the best bet for getting and maintaining your ideal weight.  The things that Charming and I learned during the clean eating challenge have inspired us to make some permanent changes.  We will keep eating breakfast, keep our portion sizes on the smaller side of reasonable, and stay active.  We will buy and consume fewer bags of chips each week.  We will buy and consume fewer alcoholic drinks each week.  We will close our ears to the siren call of the candy and ice cream, at least most of the time.  Perhaps most important, Taco Tuesday will be a treat, not a lifestyle.  

*Full disclosure: Charming had 3 drinks during the two weeks, I had 2.  We also ate enchiladas and apple pie at his parents' house 2 days before the challenge ended.

Trend Bucking

This blog's title is "Unsolicited Advice," a fact which I hope you've noticed.  One of the reasons I started writing it was to share my opinions and my advice, regardless of whether or not folks asked to hear either.  (I also felt it was important to open a discussion on fries and dipping.)  Up until now, though, I haven't really offered any advice to make folks bristle, and I haven't had anyone openly disagree with advice I've given.  This post might buck that trend.

Not my feet.

I'm here to tell you that if you need to, lose weight.  Just do it!  I'll tell you how, too.  Eat healthy, exercise more.  I totally get that it isn't always that simple.  I know there are medications, illnesses, imbalances, injuries, and genetics that complicate the weight loss process.  For those of you with a legitimate medical reason for being overweight, stop reading here; this is not for you.  But for the majority of the people who are at an unhealthy weight, it is that simple.  I realized today (not because of you, or you, or you, I promise) that people need to be informed of this fact.  I'll say it again.  Eat healthy.  Exercise more.

You know what I hear a lot?  "I've tried everything, and I just can't lose weight."  YES YOU CAN!  The "everything" that most people have tried is everything but eating healthy and exercising more.  Think about it.

Pills.  Powders.  Wraps.  Books.  Drops.  Social networking (a.k.a., spending time that could be spent exercising at the computer logging food items into a database, comparing stories with internet friends, and shopping for smaller clothes to wear when you get to your goal weight).  C'mon.  I know you know this is true:  There is no miraculous shortcut.  It isn't that you just haven't found the right pill, the right thing to cut out of your diet, or the right website to encourage you.  It's that you've been trying to take the easy way out of doing something hard.

Here's something else I often hear: "I really want to lose weight, but I just have no willpower."  My (inner, because I'm terrible at saying what I think if it might hurt someone's feelings) thought is immediately, "Then you don't really want to lose weight."  Anything you really want to accomplish, you can.  I'm completely confident in the truth of that statement.  The Ironman in the bathroom stall next to you.  Boston qualified, marathon pacer, mom of 3 boys.  Someone who really wanted to change things.  I could go on for days with examples of regular people like you and me who did hard things.  Me, I quit smoking after over 10 years of a pack-a-day addiction.  I didn't use a patch, or pills, hypnosis or lasers.  I was able to quit because I wanted to quit, and that desire was strong enough to get me through the cravings and withdrawal symptoms.  When you really want to lose weight, you'll have the willpower to resist the junk food, and you'll find the will to stick with an effective exercise regime.

I'm not saying it's easy, I'm saying it's simple.  There's quite a difference.  Healthy eating might mean making a lot of changes, some of which might not be popular with your family.  I've found that planning in advance makes it a lot easier to cook healthy meals, and you'll be a lot less likely to stop for fast food if you have dinner already planned.  I'll give you a few quick changes you can make in order to eat healthier.  Ground turkey instead of ground beef.  Baked instead of fried.  Homemade instead of processed.  Less instead of more.  Vegetables don't need butter, cheese, or bacon added to taste good.  Drink water.  I've got a lot more tips and recipes, and I know how to make really delicious treats that are much healthier than they taste.

Making exercise a daily habit isn't an easy thing, either, but it is so important.  You'll feel better.  You'll look better.  You'll be able to think more clearly, breathe easier, sleep better, and live longer.  It's not a shortcut, but the results of regular exercise can seem miraculous.

So, buck the weight-loss trends, and start losing weight.  Eat healthy foods.  Exercise.  If you want to, you'll do it.


Any questions for me?  I'll happily share recipes and exercise plans.

Got an inspiring success story?  Do tell!